Free Falling

There is a beauty in the free fall. 

I so often dream that I can fly at will. I finally mastered my childhood wish after many decades of dreaming about it: I just think "flight", set my sights heavenward and up I go. It takes a little effort but after logging at least 15 years of air time in my flight journal, I've gotten really good at it. 

At least I thought I'd mastered it until one recent dream where I was poised on a building ledge ready to take my leap upward  and realized I had no lift-off. In fact, I started to panic realizing my tricks weren't working. I finally remembered God and I said, "Father, would you please lift me?" At those simple words I was lifted by a pair of unseen hands and carried over a grassy vista. What a different sensation that was - being carried - from flying on my own. (Yes, I am still talking about flying without a craft!)

To be carried by God was far superior to my striving to leap. The difference? Admitting my helplessness. Losing control.  To admit my absolute helplessness is terrifying at first, but liberating once I get over myself.

What does it mean to stop striving at things - even things we have heretofore done well - and entrust oneself to God? To do the unthinkable when the world and our own logic tells us that If it is to Be it's up to Me?

"Father, would you please provide for me?" "Father, would you please avenge this evil instead of me?"  "Father, would you please take these reins out of my hands?" "Father, if you don't make a way, there is no way".

"Nevertheless, not my will, but thy will be done," said Jesus when faced with the cross. Just before breathing His last He said, "Father, Into your hands I commit my Spirit". What a horrific circumstance in which to yield to a pair of unseen hands! Yet in His perfected humanity, He did it. In our pitiful state - in my pitiful state - how can we do anything less?